Ok, here's the rules:

If anyone knows any Chuck Norris jokes, replace "Chuck Norris" with "Mana".

example: When Mana fall into a lake, the lake doesn't get wet, the lake get's Mana'd.

OK, GO!

"Mana doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants."

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Mana.

Mana is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Mana doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Mana doesn't sleep, he waits.

Mana counted to infinity- twice.

Mana does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence.

Mana CAN lick his elbow.

P is for Mana, as is every other letter of the alphabet.

Mana can have his cake, AND eat it too.

XDDDDDD AWESOME!

Mana invented water. ... or was it Turkwise?

The active ingredient in Red Bull is Mana's sweat

Oh God, I could be here all night...XD

Mana delievers more male with one thrust of his pelvis than the U.S. Postal Service and the Pony Express combined for the last 146 years.

When Mana picks his nose, he REALLY does find Gold.

Mana's smile once brought a puppy back to life.

Niagra Falls is the result of one of Mana's legendary cannon balls.

When Mana crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways

Mana wasn't born with feet, just boots.

Mana is a stunt double for Optimus Prime.

Mana floats like a butterfly and stings like a tomahawk missile. At mach 3. In the face.

Mana can clap with one hand.

Mana was once asked to repeat himself. The last thing that person ever heard was the wooshing sound of a roundhouse kick.

Mana can MAKE water run uphill.

Mana does not dance, he round house kicks to the beat.

Mana doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

Mana invented the corndog.

Mana belives the hype.

When Mana was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.

Mana's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

A picture is worth a thousand words. A Mana is worth 1 billion words.

When Mana talks, everybody listens. And dies.

Mana always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

When taking the SAT, write "Mana" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

Mana invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tohru invented pink.

Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Mana

Mana can touch MC Hammer.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Moi-meme-Moitie pajamas.

*cracking up* XDDDDDD oh god, I LOVE your jokes!

LOL XD I love chuck norris jokes so much.

What a thing to wake up to this morning........ :D

^Exactly XD

I havent laughed this hard in months. But now Im getting crazy stares... O__o

LOL

Mana's smile once brought a puppy back to life.




^^it probably would and all.... its so bloody rare XD

LOL These are great
XDDDDDDD

Mana's tears can cure cancer, but Mana never cries.....ever.

side joke: in Russia awesome is Mana. :lol:

If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Mana

On the 7th day, God rested.... Mana took over.

Mana doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Mana tells it to.

Ice isn’t cold water, it’s water that is scared still by Mana.

Mana can divide by zero.

Mana can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

Overused joke of the day: Come to the dark side! We have Mana!

We've so taken Mana humour to the next level XD

Not the best, but...

Mana rips CDs with his hands.
Mana can write DVDs on floppy drive.
Mana once finished "The Song that Never Ends".
Mana can tie his shoes with his feet.
Mana can drown a fish.
Once a cobra bit Mana's leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

Oh, shit.

XDDD

Totally. XDDDD

It got Mana'd!! :rolleyes:

Oh no, Mana is now a verb! XD

Mana is EVERYTHING.

Dixionary (pun intended) entry for Mana:
Mana(1), noun: The lead guitarist of M10M. See also: God, DIX, Turkwise
Mana(2), verb: See 'Mana'd'
Mana'd(1), verb: To be stabbed by Mana with his sharp sword
Mana'd(2): To be PWNED by Mana
Mana'd(3): To be PWNED by Mana's awesome powers of DIX!! \m/

HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!! -dies- all these jokes are hilarious! and too right Mana IS everything

XDDDDDD

Winner winner chicken dinner! :lol:

Mana: n. lead guitarist of MdM, (see God) v. to be pwned by Mana, adj. to be freaking awesome, adv. to perform with unbelievable style, conj. substitute for 'and.'

MANA IS EVERYTHING.

Oh Mana, you win!! I admit defeat!! :lol: :D

Mana`d? omg I gues I have to use this verb like...everywhere *_* I guess I`ll start in school, yeah my classmates know Mana very well, I don`t know why >_>

OH SNAP, now the man is in the dictionary! XDDD

This halloween, if I freak out my friends in my Mana cosplay, I should totally yell out "MANA'D!" :lol:

MOAR

I'm not making these up, though D: I'm not that creative... I'm just using some Chuck jokes that haven't been used yet.

Mana once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Mana built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Mana met all three bullets with his super hairsprayed mullet of doom, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

Mana is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Mana.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Mana.

It was once believed that Mana actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Mana himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.

If you can see Mana, he can see you. If you can't see Mana, you may be only seconds away from death.

A duck's quack does not echo. Mana is solely responsible for this phenomenon. When asked why he will simply stare at you, grimly.

Mana doesn't believe in Germany.

If you want a list of Mana's enemies, just check the extinct species list.

Mana doesn't need to swallow when eating food.

Mana does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Mana can kill him and take it.

Mana only masturbates to pictures of Mana.

Mana can win a game of Monopoly without owning any property.

In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Mana, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever gotten.

Mana's belly button is actually a power outlet.

On his birthday, Mana blows out his candles by blinking.

Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Mana.

Mana graduated from school with a degree in Mana.

Dixionary (pun intended) entry for Mana:
Mana(1), noun: The lead guitarist of M10M. See also: God, DIX, Turkwise
Mana(2), verb: See 'Mana'd'
Mana'd(1), verb: To be stabbed by Mana with his sharp sword
Mana'd(2): To be PWNED by Mana
Mana'd(3): To be PWNED by Mana's awesome powers of DIX!! \m/

^^ now of course, Oxford will have to rewrite the dictionary for this purpose. LOL XD


OMG! the extinction and outer space one is hilarious! I'm literally on the brink of tears.

Im so gonna graduate with a degree of Mana and get "mana'd".

Man those jokes were awesome. XDDD

Mana can slam revolving doors.

The grass is always greener on the other side... Unless Mana has been there, then it's soaked with tears and blood.

Mana once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now the Islands.

Mana is the reason Waldo is hiding.

Mana sleeps with a night light. Not because Mana is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Mana.

A tsunami is water running away from Mana.

Mana doesn't get brain freeze. Slurpees know when to back the fuck off.

Mana does not teabag the ladies, he potato sacks them.

If Mana is late, time better slow the hell down.

Mana has to sort his clothes into three piles: Blacks, whites, and bloodstains.

The most effective form of suicide known by man is typing Mana into Google and hit 'I'm feeling lucky!'.

Jesus walked on water. Mana walked on Jesus.

Mana doesn't use pickup lines, he just says 'now'.

When God said 'let there be light', Mana said 'say please'.

Oh snap those were awesome! XDDD

Somehow I think he'd appreciate that one XD

Bullets dodge Mana.

Mana used to beat the shit out of his shadow because it was following too close. It now stands a safe 30 feet behind him.

Mana doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."

Mana doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the fuck out of the way.

When Mana looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Mana and Mana.

It is considered a great accomplishment to go down Niagara Falls in a wooden barrel. Mana can go up Niagara Falls in a cardboard box.

When Mana enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.

Mana never retreats, he just attacks in the opposite direction.

Mana can strangle you with a cordless phone.

Mana can build a snowman out of rain.

Death once had a near-Mana experience.

Ghosts are actually caused by Mana killing people faster than Death can process them.

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Mana's PC will crash.

Mana's dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Mana will not take shit from anyone.

Oh man, that was hilarious.

This one was the best!!! :lol: ^^

XDd i know i thought that... in fact that one gave me a laughing fit XD